watching just a video about some of the pioneers and I had the spirit
hit me so strong about me, that I needed to let it go. As soon as I
felt it I just started balling my eyes out. I could barely control
myself at all. I told Elder Ashcraft, and he gave me a blessing. After
the blessing the light that came to me was unbelievable I literally
felt like I was being wrapped up in Christs arms. The pains and the
sorrows that I have felt and the anger and resentment towards
football, myself, and God that I have felt for 2 years was gone
instantly. I realized how much my anger from my knee was holding me
back. I feel as if a 1,000 pound weight has been lifted off my
shoulders. I'm so grateful to God and Jesus. I know this weight will
never come back to me. For the first time in my life, I am grateful
for the trial of my knee. We never need fear that what we are going
through is to much for us. God always provides for his children. The
question we need to ask is do I have enough faith to endure? I'm so
grateful for my mission. I have realized that if I wasn't on my
mission, I probably wouldn't have figured this out for years. What an
amazing blessing that the gospel is in my life.
Wednesday was awesome we had our new missionary training. It was 5
hours long, and I actually stayed awake the whole time haha. It was
super spiritual and I learned so much. My biggest take away from it is
how much God actually trusts me. They talked about how on average each
area has about 46,000 people. That means that God has trusted me with
that many people's souls. I think it's so humbling and powerful to see
how much responsibility I have as a missionary. It made me feel so
inadequate haha. The second biggest thing I learned is how to baptize
and how to have success on my mission. Everything stems from faith. Do
I have enough faith to baptize? Do I trust God enough to lead me to
people who are ready for the gospel? You can be the most talented
missionary in the world but without faith you're not going to do
anything. I've really been working at having enough faith and I hope I
have enough faith.
Thursday and Friday were really hard for me. After the spiritual highs
of the last two days I thought for sure we were going to start seeing
huge miracles happen, but we didn't. They were the same as usual
almost nothing happened at all. I was so frustrated and so was Elder
Ashcraft, we couldn't figure out at all why nothing was happening. We
talked about it for a long time and we both thought we were working
hard and that we had enough faith so we couldn't understand why
nothing was happening. Then something from the Ricciardi letter came
to my mind,
The mission experience is to do what you are told, when you are told, to
go where you are asked, and know that the blessing comes from enduring
what I ask of you. This is not about you; it is about opening your
mouth at all times in all places. Doing my will without thought to
the end result or consequence… this is what serving a mission is.
This helped me out so much and was so powerful to me.
Saturday was so much fun. The whole morning we got to put up hay. It
was so fun I felt like a farmer haha. The place that we were at was a
straight farm. There were animals everywhere. It was really cool
because the guy we did it for has cancer and could barely walk at all,
it's awesome how much we can help people's lives out here! Later that
day we also got to talk to this guy from the military. He was so cool!
He expressed how cool it was that we give up everything and come out
here for two years. He said he looked up to us so much for doing that,
and we are going to meet with him on Wednesday so I'm excited for
that!
Sunday was horrible. Church went really well and was spiritual, but
after lunch I felt so sick. We went to visit someone in the hospital
and as soon as we left I started throwing up. I got the worst migraine
and I laid in bed for the rest of the day. Being sick on the mission I
think has been the worst experience so far. I felt so stupid, I felt
like I was wasting the lords time. So ya yesterday was really tough!
I'm loving it though I can't believe I've been out for 2 months now
it's crazy how fast time flies out here! Love
And miss you all!
Much love,
Elder Taeoalii
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